Bruce Cameron

Editor’s Note: The following column was originally published in 2009.

There are three types of bicycles: There’s the kind of bike built for riding on the roads, there’s the kind of bike built for riding on the trails, and there’s the kind of bike built for storing in my garage.

When my friend Joel offered to let me ride with his “Morning Road Bike Club,” I very enthusiastically declined. I explained to him that there is just something offensive to me about the word “morning.” Besides, owning my kind of bicycle means that its tires are flat and also I haven’t even seen the thing since 1997. It’...