A Tribute to Ebony and Ivory

As a white mom with four adopted black children I would like to pause and celebrate ebony and ivory or black, white and everything in between. The chaos of the last weeks has been perplexing at best and distressing at worst. However, I believe there is much to celebrate. There will always be wrong doing, but for one moment can we pause and celebrate the good.

All four of my children have been adopted before they were two. Their pasty white family is the only family they have ever known. So the following are examples of how ebony and ivory can live together in almost perfect harmony. My now 16 year old son has suffered one difficult year health-wise and has spent large chunks of time at home on the couch. My soon to be 92 year-old mother lives with us and is the only grandparent my younger three children have ever known. Dementia is the land she lives in. The two of them home together while I was working was a very real blessing. She was able in body and he was able in brain. Though I would never wish any 16 year-old to live the life my son has lived the last year, his kindness toward his grandmother has been evident and obvious on multiple occasions. Not because of edict or force, but because we are family.

The topic of race does not rule our dinner table or overwhelm the circuits of our home. Actually we rarely talk about race or the color of our skin. It does take people a moment to digest our families appearance at times but rarely ever crosses my mind until I hear their long pause in conversation. And to that pause I usually answer, "I know we look a lot alike." My kids have been one of the most important personal decisions I have ever made. I can't imagine life without them and I would guess they would say the same. My three girls have always been helpful and kind without guile. My son, a normal mixture of teenage maturity. Not to say we have not had our difficulties, but to say we have worked to overcome them.

I believe that America has a long tradition of overcoming obstacles and difficulties led not by masses, but by individuals who have made hard choices in times of crisis. Our history is littered with names of people who have overcome in the face of challenge. Likely the most notable, President Abraham Lincoln, who persevered in a nation that was not terribly unlike what we find ourselves in today. Hetty Green, a woman before her time, overcoming the male dominant era she found herself in to become the richest woman in America in 1890. Booker T. Washington who became a prominent black educator in a time when it was difficult to get an education if you were black. Hariet Tubman devising her own way out of slavery and providing it for others using the underground railroad. The list could go on and on but the fact remains that real change happens one person at a time when people have the will and determination to make a difference.

I coached a girls AAU basketball team for my twin girls a few years ago. It is notable that the team had significant heritage from India, Africa, the middle east, Native American Indian, Mexico and Northern Europe. In a group of nine girls no more than two girls shared the same ethnicity. We didn't win many basketball games but we could have won the diversity trophy. I believe that is something to celebrate America.

I would like to close with a story about my oldest daughter. She went off to college in Seattle and her very first room mate was from the highest cast in India. Obviously we are middle class Americans but my daughter from the depths of poverty in Ethiopia. When I look at their backgrounds and where they came from, the distance could not be further. In either native country their friendship would have been a very unlikely possibility. However, on American soil and a smile from God above they have been best of friends for years. America please stand up and take a bow for what is good and right and just. America you haven't gotten it right every time but you have some times so can we pause the chaos for a moment and celebrate the sometimes!

- Lisa Meyer is a resident of Pullman. She can be contacted via the Gazette at [email protected].